UPS delivered a box to my house the other day. I had no idea what was in it since I didn't remember ordering anything.

I brought the box inside and opened it up. Inside the box I found a pair of Teva shoes. I DO NOT remember ordering them. I think I might have a problem!

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not sorry I ordered them. The price is great. I only buy things like this on clearance so that's not a problem but still... I should remember doing the shopping and buying. Shouldn't I???

Maybe I need some kind of Internet shopping 12-step program. They must have programs like that out there somewhere.

In any case, here's what they look like. They're nice. Just the sort of thing I wear.

I just wish I remembered buying them.

I really do find it a mite troubling... and what in hell is "spider rubber?"


Teresa said…
You REALLY should remember ordering things. I generally only forget about things that are on a lengthy back order. And if it takes so long to fulfill an order that I forget about it, that company goes on my "don't order from them" list. But then again, maybe they were a gift and it just wasn't acknowledged as such? Or maybe you really are losing it. You need some brain food, maybe?
Malibu Stacy said…
Before you fall asleep tonight while you're lying in your bed relaxing and slowly drifting off into sleep... I want you to think of me. Think of me and imagine that you can fly. Imagine that you're weightless. You can float gently into the air if you want to. Safe, and calm, and serene. You can fly away and leave all your burdens and worries and fears behind you.

Imagine that. What a nice feeling it is. Next time you see me, when I say hello you'll remember that good feeling and you will want to buy me things online. Because when you do buy me things online, you feel that a heavy weight has been lifted from your shoulders. I'll say hello and you will feel as light as a feather... as if you are floating on air.

Why don't you sit here a moment and think about that before you go back to work?

I wear a size 9, by the way.
kenju said…
They do look comfortable and I like the color. Have no idea what spider leather refers to.

I think I might worry if I ordered something I had NO memory of, Dave. Maybe you were up late at night and did it?
Utopia said…
Please listen to the song "vegematic" by steve goodman.
Lyrics here:

Vegematic: Steve Goodman

Fell asleep last night with the T-V on. Oh, what a dream I had.
I dreamed I answered every single one of those late night mail order ads.
And four to six weeks later, much to my surprise,
The mailman came to my front door, and I couldn't believe my eyes
When he brought the Vegematic, and the Pocket Fisherman too,
Illuminated illustrated history of life,
And Boxcar Willie with a Ginzu knife,
A bamboo steamer, and a Garden Weasel too,
And a tie-dyed, dayglow souvenir shirt from Six Flags Over Burbank.

The doorbell rang all morning and into the afternoon.
I shook with fright as it rang all night to the light of the Master Card moon.
There was Parcel Post in the pantry, and UPS in the hall,
C O D's to the ceiling, and I just couldn't pay for it all.

I got the egg scrambler, with a Seal-a-Meal carrying case,
A set of presidential commemorative plates
So I could eat my eggs off the President's face,
A Minute Mender, and a needle that'll knit or crochet,
And an autographed photograph of Rin Tin Tin at Six Flags Over Burbank.

(same chords as 2nd verse:)

I remembered I was dreaming, so I gave a mighty cheer.
When I awoke, it was no joke, 'cause all that shit was here.
So if you fall asleep with the TV on, let me tell you what to do:
Tear the telephone out of the wall unless you want it to happen to you.
You'll get the Vegematic, and the Pocket Fisherman too,
Illuminated illustrated history of life,
And Boxcar Willie with a Ginzu knife,
A bamboo steamer, and a smokeless ashtray too

And an all expenses paid weekend for three at Six Flags Over Burbank.
rosemary said…
Dave....i forget about stuff i ordered all of the time...I forget about stuff i bought and agreed to pay for months later. I buy stuff that doesn't fit and never send it back....I give it to a friend. I don't let it worry me. Unless it costs a lot.
simplycol said…
The internet just seems to lend itself to spur of the moment shopping. :-). I say.. If the shoe fits.. wear it.
Michael Manning said…
I have to recheck what I order. The other day I was ordering what I thought was a Steve McQueen DVD with Kackie Gleason--a comedy called "A Soldier in the Rain". But no. It turned out to be "The Jackie Gleason Collection" and I cancelled it. Easy to overlook, Utenzi!:)
srp said…
Why do I seem to remember you posting about buying some shoes? Hmm... of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most!

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